You depressed my advice DECORATE...............don't kill yourself don't jump off a bridge things can get better, key is focus on one item at a time..................

You depressed my advice DECORATE...............don't kill yourself don't jump off a bridge things can get better, key is focus on one item at a time..................I have been suicidal a few times so this is a topic I actually know a lot about. In that past were I was bugging out of my mind and certain the cosmos was out to get me and the only relief was going to be jumping off a bridge for reals.........................I was at those times forgeting something ---------- YOU CAN DO SOMETHING ALWAYS TO MAKE YOUR LOT IN LIFE BETTER!
   Don't focus on every last thing ------ like me ---------- I would like a bff, I am for the past few years completely bff less : ( as in nobody I can call on the phone and say "hey would you like to go to the mall and get a frozen yogurt" so tragic.
   It might not be in the cards for me right now a bff, might not be in the cards for me ever to get a bff. But there's always something you can do to make your lot in life better ------------ above pick I did this last night............originally those pics were just boringly on the wall, I added a simple scarf and a plant in the middle - BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
   Also the lamp, I took a sequin scarf that though looked great on me was itching my neck and some medival torture contraption on my neck -------- YA SEQUINS AND NECKS NOT A MATCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  HAHAHAHAHAHH painted that lamp shade purple last night, chopped up my scarf and w/the glue gun glued it on my lamp - BETTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  I'm on like day 33 I think of the "Supreme 90 day system" BETTER!!!!!!!!!!.......................ya I'm not there yet this a recent pic of me..................60 days from now I'm more the confident ubber confident I am going to be looking and feeling GREAT..............................

   I really right now want to focus on the last verse that we are "more then conquerors" but the rest is pertinent to, bad stuffs it happens, sometimes REAL BAD...........Romans 8:35-38 "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us."
   Usually bad circumstances they just temporary - and even if they weren't temporary - the big picture isn't how social we are and how many many many bff's we have though this world is mega sociabable and having many bff's.............Matthew 24:13 "But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved." You know like keep workin on following jesus, walk in the spirit in the day so you won't be like I have been stupidely lately cracking here and there buying dork stuffs..............Galatians 5:16 "This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh."
  ENDURE ENDURE ENDURE ENDURE ENDURE HANG IN THERE DON'T GIVE UP ---- THERE IS MORE THEN HOPE THERE IS A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL .Matthew 24:13 "But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.
   For reals though anyone who is going through a bad time, focus on 1 thing at a time you can make better in your life - just pick 1 item perferably start out with 1 item that is doable instead of a more harder to acheive item and then work your way up the goal ladder.
   I may never ever get a bff again in my entire life ------------- but I will be I am "in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us" probably you only loose if you give up, cheat yourself if you give up...................Hebrews 10:38 "Now the just shall live by faith: but if any man drawback, my soul shall have no pleasure in him." Not just in spiritual matters but also if you give up "getting fit" YOU CHEAT YOURSELF OF THAT JOY OF LOOSING THOSE NEXT 5 LBS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
   Don't let this world kick you down "shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword" --------- get back up and KICK BUTT
  There earth you have been motivated for the day now go forth AND ROCK!
ps. to decorate ones home think outside the box, some the bestest means of decorating involve mosaic tiles, paint, and/or reclaimed wood (shabby sheik it's fab sometimes) I set one decorating project for myself to do a day, rome it just wasn't built in a day, few years pry, few years wait wait for it : )
hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahaahahahahahahha

In the year 2021 there are tons of tents and homeless people all over the Portland Oregon area

looks to be a great deal of the homeless are here in Portland Oregon

Please consider donating money to...............

https://www.oregonfoodbank.org/

My garage sale finds for today (people pry wouldn't look at me and peg me a elvis fan but I am)........

And look at all this "bonus content" for this blog post hahaha...............one artsy picture taken today 2021................

I believe most this world is under a spell REALLY I REALLY DO........

  I counted cards but it's not illegial...........

https://www.freep.com/story/entertainment/nightlife/2016/04/05/mark-pilarski-casinos-counting-cards/82538428/

Blog post where my niece meanly tells me "someone's off their meds" even though they all know I am not on medication. My family thinks being mean to people with "mental disabilities" is fun and plenty ok to do. After my niece made fun of me like that my mom wanted me to apologize to my niece but when I ask "for what" she had no reply. 

https://givingittogod.blogspot.com/2021/06/i-destroyed-my-family-by-taking-and.html

If there are any people "on medication" out there - your not broken either. Being on medication is no different then if say you were missing a limb and so you wear a prostetic limb........

That your on medication is something you can't do anything about that you find yourself "in that spot" in life. 

It's not something to make fun of people about....though in my families minds it is.........but it ain't.

(update 2021 the video of madonna's that I used for this post has been taken down from you tube so, you'll just have to imagine many likely photo's of madonna in various "fashions") I sat there watching all those pics of madonna in the latest fashions in this video and I used to worship that  buisiness, but if that's all you live for ------------ AND THAT'S IT THAT IS YOUR GLORY =================== SAD
Last night listening to christian radio, the pastor made mention of the harlots "sorceries" or like the spell the harlot has on the earth..............and that's what it hits me as it being "a spell" like a galactic earthwide spell that most the earth is like under. (like I'm saying a lot of the earth is bewitched!!!!!!!!!!! I really believe it!!!!!!!!!!!!) I don't know where that verse is that that pastor was talking about late last night but I believe most the earth is under some kind of spell!!!!!!!!!! I REALLY BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! Isaiah 47:12 "Stand now with thine enchantments, and with the multitude of thy sorceries, wherein thou hast laboured from thy youth; if so be thou shalt be able to profit, if so be thou mayest prevail."
    I'm not going to say marilyn monroe was outright a sorceress.........but it would be possible to dress in a way to act in a way to cast some kind of spell on everyone, but she was pry "enchanted" herself............being "enchanted" you don't even know it's done happened to you.  People on this earth under some massive spell aren't even aware of.
   Real glory I believe comes from following christ! This world's "glory" isn't really glory at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Romans 2: 7-9 "To them who by patient continuance in well doing seek for glory and honour and immortality, eternal life: But unto them that are contentious, and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, indignation and wrath, Tribulation and anguish, upon every soul of man that doeth evil, of the Jew first, and also of the Gentile;"
I want the glory that I can get from following jesus!

These days I play suduko........there is even "mega suduko" and it does satisfy my "counting needs"

there are "other things" I count but I only speak about that "counting" to a select few people........because like memorizing 50-60 hands of video poker...........I count something that is online that someone should NOT be able to count and beat like that. It's a little to extreme of counting for me to even speak about it. 

Have a great day!

bodybuilding and following jesus is starting to go hand in hand for me.....both requiring disicpline............

(above pic me 7-18-2017 hard at work aging in reverse -------- forget how I look you all to buisy judging people on how they look. It's how I feel, I feel so much better, after tweaking my workout ruitine and my diet to)
The elder of the ACCA church don't like bodybuilding so much says it has the potential to be a "vain thing" --------- but for me it's fun (I wrote this sentence in 2012 when I was still going to that church). Jesus came so we could have life more abundantly.............John 10:10 "The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly." (some people's health is badly off for reasons out of their control..........but a life more abundantly is a more healthy life I think..........for some people obtaining health is via going for walks.........I happen to enjoy eating some things that require for me to have a bit extra metabolism................if you have to peck at salads your whole life - that isn't life more abundantly in my estimation)
bodybuilding and following jesus is starting to go hand in hand for me.....both requiring disicpline............something I'm somedays a bit short on. It takes a lot of discipline I find to keep my  1 Corinthians 9:27 "But I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway."
   So body building often I find when I'm rather faithful in bodybuilding it has some topple over effect a good effect into my abilities to follow jesus fully (when I'm trying to as I call it "ramp up" bulk up the muscles.........what I eats down to a science, lean meats lot's of fish, lots of beans, lot's of veggies - bout to get some fiber in the liquid format cause that's bestest for my bodybuilding goals to drink my fiber for the day ------ basically I stay away from potatoe chips, ice cream (eat frozen yogurt instead), donuts - definately all about these days limiting my carb intake) very regimented it is my entire diet and workout "supreme 90 day system" also ab circle, and nordic trac.
  Keeping your body "under, and bring it into subjection" as paul talks about in 1 corinthians 9:27 I find takes a lot of discipline. BUT WORTH IT! For 1 John 2:16 "For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world." I don't want to be a friend with the world, I don't want to be about "the lust of the flesh" that's the one that mega stands out to me, that's the one I usually battle.
  So as goofy as it maybe I've decided to stick with bodybuilding for life (or as long as I can manage it) cause it's been so good for me having all that self discipline bible talks about "temperance" which is also a word for self discipline pretty much..........Galatians 5:22-23 "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, Meekness, temperance: against such there is no law." Also with bodybuilding just staying focused (on basically being self disciplined ------- takes focus all day long, all day long I have to focus on what I'm eating and how much water I'm drinking etc. - it's me self disciplining myself all day FOR A GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! as is crucifying your flesh to it's lusts and desires it's FOR A GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Galatians 5:24 "And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts."
   I would post up a pick with this blog post but I'm still a bit "fluffy" few more days into the Supreme 90 day system and I will : ) But for me bodybuilding has became something much more then about the muscles I'm gaining, it's about the self discipline I'm gaining that much needed self discipline in the day - that I have that everyday all day long and obtain my fitness and spiritual goals is my prayer.
  Being buff is just going to be like a nice bonus : ) Have a great day earth!

  remember it isn't how fast you run this race that is life..........it's that you keep running.............hopefully we all are running to jesus and not this world or the things of it............

I'm painting turtles lately : ) 

John 13:34-35 "A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another."........................

ps.........Yes there are rich christians as well. But many christians are not rich. James 2:5 "Hearken, my beloved brethren, Hath not God chosen the poor of this world rich in faith, and heirs of the kingdom which he hath promised to them that love him?"

The latest for me for 6/7/2021 

and my rendition of Rhiannon by Fleetwood Mack below.......

I think god wants me to talk about my recent near death experience (real real near death)..............

Update 5/25/2025 this is one of the most popular posts at the moment who knows why?) Could be because I say I am a christian goth in this blog post that is way from the year 2012 I'm guessing so. But honest I've been a goth my entire life, it's just that only in the recent few years have I ALSO started listening to goth music and walking through cemetaries more etc. I always as a kid watched adams family and the monsters and related to them much more then - when me and my brother and sister watched happy days. Nothing wrong with happy days, or three company........etc.............fine shows. I just related to the monsters and the adams family more. 

I'm looking more "goth" these days.................from this weekend...................

Oregon Food Bank

https://www.paypal.com/US/fundraiser/charity/1427607

Me looking "normie" in 2012 when my kids were small still.....................

(my whole family helped out at the foodbank recently - they had a good time 😊)

I think god wants me to talk about my recent near death experience (real real near death)..............it was a normal day for me, sendin out a e-mail, all the sudden I felt like I was going to throw up start heading for the bathroom the room starting spinning so much I was being thrown to the side.........didn't make it to the bathroom was thrown onto the floor by the couch, threw up a slew, starting worrying sweating so much room spinning, I thought well go to the bathroom and shower cool down before I die.....................stumble to the shower turn it on.............MADE IT WORSE.................the room spun so fast I lept out of the shower, at that point I couldn't move, had my kids bring me water drank it threw it up, drank some more water threw it up................and then I told my oldest child to call 911 cause I wasn't able to keep down water or move. And I prayed to, the praying gave me some peace at the time, having god with me.
  They wrap a blanket around me carrying me into the ambulance some the ambulance ride I had my eye's closed the room was spinning so much............but like what the last half I had my eye's open...........AND I WASN'T FULLY IN MY BODY............my view of the ambulance was from the side wall of it............but I knew in my head that no the ambulance is still on the street the ground is still facing down below me not what I'm seeing through my eye's............the ambulance turned light had that angel glow about it felt like a church that peace settled on me, I knew if I died it'd be ok.
   Well this just convinced me even moreso to live for jesus!

I donated $6.00 instead of my usual $5 cause god likes us to be zealous. 

Revelation 3:16 "So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth." And I feel that 6 is a more lucky number for me these days anyways................technically 6.66 I feel is probably super mega lucky for me these days, but I was all trying to behave. But next time I think I will donate $6.66 cause God wants us to be zealous. 

   And god likes a cheerful giver, and I feel at the $6.66 dollar amount I definately will be the cheerfulest 😂💓💓💓💓💓💓💓 - true story though I'm a christian goth

2012 me originally titled this: "iniquity is abounding but instead of my love growing cold I'm starting to enjoy being around other christians more then ever...................." 2021 me would like to speak about the idea that the iniquity of a city could consume us Genesis 19:15 "And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city."..............

   2021 me would like to speak about the idea that the iniquity of a city could consume us Genesis 19:15 "And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city."..............   

 Original post from 2012.....................little baby me, taught to be so optimistic all the time......

 Iniquity is abounding but instead of my love growing cold I'm starting to enjoy being around other christians more then ever. These verses are epic to me................Matthew 24:11-13 "And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many. And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold. But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved." One the pastors at apostolic christian church of america in portland that I go to, mentioned that he goes to god's word and doesn't like listen to like every last "prophet, preacher, whatever out there" (I think he's worried, cause he knows that some his congregation is sometimes mega gullible - aka me) And I know I'm mega gullible I take that into account these days.
   But anyways that is says the "many false prophets" that shall rise "SHALL DECEIVE MANY" like they absolutely will!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  Matthew 24:24 "For there shall arise false Christs, and false prophets, and shall shew great signs and wonders; insomuch that, if it were possible, they shall deceive the very elect."
  But anyways instead of my love growing cold, all the inquity abounding in the body of christ, is like not having that effect on me lately..............I still find like in the body of christ to be like pretty good for myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  Inquities abounding outside the body of christ to, not everywhere, but definately iniquity is like starting to abound I believe. Which just hypes me for jesus return all the more I do believe..............it's the final countdown!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

https://loveachild.com/

"Sheri 2021 is up to stuffs with her song choices people 

oh nelllllllllllllllllllllllly"

This old post was when I didn't have many "good works" and so I had to rely on my looks. 1 Timothy 2:9-10 "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works".............................

This old post was when I didn't have many "good works" and so I had to rely on my looks. 1 Timothy 2:9-10 "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works".............................

neutragena's exfoliator get's my thumbs up for sure, I ain't having to wear makeup no more : )..................I'm nearing 40 (put up my age then I'm like nah bestest be safe online), this is a pic I took today of myself (granted I look better these days in general due to my fruit and veggies diet : ) This is me with no makeup on, but some lip gloss, and some mascara. I pegged the foundation as the culprit for my acne!!!!!!!!!! And even that bare minerals stuffs was causing my acne to flair up!!!!!!!!

  there's still some acne on my chin as you can see, but I don't think it's so bad looking anymore, I mean I think I look pretty good without makeup these days : )
   I'm enjoying not having to wear makeup, it's so much easier on me waking up and brushing my hair getting dressed, and adding some mascara, and lipgloss and boom good to go (and I wear contacts).
  yep thanks to neutragena's exfoliator do dad I'm loving life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (and I use a stridex maximum strength acne pad everyday, to make sure no zits happen - I mean a zit has to go through fort knox on my face anymore : ) hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah
   Have a great day earth! I don't even miss makeup look at this pick it's so much better to let my inner beauty shine out!!!!!!!!!!!! Bye bye makeup!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SINARA NOT MISSING YOU!
http://www.neutrogena.com/category/anti-aging/microdermabrasion+system.do?nType=1

 There are people in the body of christ right now (this is sheri 2021) that have no good works, or hardly none they are having to solely rely on "haul" video's on you tube etc. - the horror

They are pry christians some them anyways. 

Many times out there - the outward appearance just isn't the "whole story"

if  you are like I was and still am to be honest disliked by a ton of the body of christ

Don't give up following Jesus

whatever that looks like for you

God see's your heart. 

He see's what everyone else out there is missing.

2 Corinthians 10:6-8 "And having in a readiness to revenge all disobedience, when your obedience is fulfilled. Do ye look on things after the outward appearance? if any man trust to himself that he is Christ's, let him of himself think this again, that, as he is Christ's, even so are we Christ's. For though I should boast somewhat more of our authority, which the Lord hath given us for edification, and not for your destruction, I should not be ashamed:"

Have a great day!

(Sheri 2021 confessing my main secret to staying young is God um "empowering" me) I've decided I want to be forever young if only in my heart and soul....................

I've decided I want to be forever young if only in my heart and soul....................

   When I was like 18 I was just like all the other 18 year olds I thought man I'm going to be so grown up someday and it's going to be AWESOME hahahahahahahahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH ya it totally didn't happen, oh and then when I graduated from college I thought graduation day I thought man I'm going to be so grown up now (hahahahahahahahahah) I'm going to get a big fancy job and wear all the designer duds and be so big and grown up it's going to be great (hahahahahahahahahahahahah) then when I was like 24 or so and the big grown up still hadn't hit me hahahahahahahahahahahahahahHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH well you all can see where this trend is heading hahahahahahahahah but I've decided it's for the best, and I want to be forever young if only in my heart and soul...............Matthew 18:3 "And said, Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven." (the one verse in the bible I don't have to make a effort to heed - comes naturally for me : )
I'm pry going to get new teeth well fake teeth but uh ya saw this commercial today on tv.............http://www.snaponsmile.com/sos_CTD_website_front in the 5th grade some kids on the playground decided to pull a prank on me, well I was on top this rocking like monkey bar thing sitting up on top of it, they all jumped instantly other side I went flying through the bars and broke a tooth ---------- ever since then I've been not really um confident with my smile at all.
note in latest pic no smile no no no no see the teeth..........................emo hair it's the best : )....................

sheri adding to this post in 2021........

Psalm 103:4-6 "Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies; Who satisfieth thy mouth with good things; so that thy youth is renewed like the eagle's. The Lord executeth righteousness and judgment for all that are oppressed."

photo from today to compare to pic from 2012 above....................

(unlike my 2012 cell phone, my 2021 cell phone doesn't have a time stamp feature on it)

Luke 6:27 "But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you,"............................

Matthew 23:26 "Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also." The Apostolic Christian Church of America, deserves all our mercy since how they are so blind. So blind, that they choose "commandments of men" their PERFECT OUTWARD IMAGE......no jewelry, no wedding rings back when I tried to become a member of this church, only buns in womens hair that's all that's allowed, etc. etc. etc...........over me. And that is sad. Because their perfect outward image ISN'T EVEN THE TRUTH.........Revelation 3:16-18 "So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth. Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked: I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and that the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eyesalve, that thou mayest see." ------------------- me I'm a mess saved by grace 👍 not the acca church they are perfect flawless saints in need of nothing. Their buns are perfect, their attire is always perfect, they're always polite and perfect. They never sin, why would they do that, they are perfect, they don't even have faults inside their souls...........don't be ridiculous THEY ARE FLAWLESS..........that is why they can't show mercy to me. According to their main elder I'm a piece of garbage that could NEVER become a member of their church. 

Because I'm so young these days few more selfies 😂............

  Some say "your a as young as you feel" - I agree with that idea. We can't feel young everyday. But if you can manage to feel young most of the time 👍 

  I want to add more verses from psalms..........

Psalm 103:1-4 "Bless the Lord, O my soul: and all that is within me, bless his holy name. Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits:  Who forgiveth all thine iniquities; who healeth all thy diseases; Who redeemeth thy life from destruction; who crowneth thee with lovingkindness and tender mercies;" ----- some people make God out to be a horrible guy, this is who God really is. 

  Now people they ain't all merciful - I wish they were. But God is. 

  I'm not saying keep sinning, I'm saying God is good, and worthy to be praised!