love scares me......anyone else afraid of love?.............

 Blessed Be Apostolic Christian Church of America 

may Jesus Christ our Lord accept your repentances 

and usher you into his beloved and may you dwell in green pastures for all the days of your lives. 

Fresh edit the year 2020 I've been accused of being a malicious attacker of the Apostolic Christian church of America so many times by members of their church I now add this verse..........Ephesians 4:15  "But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:" (please forgive mini christian me from several years ago with this sad blog post) Little mini christian me from several years ago didn't know Proverbs 17:19 "He loveth transgression that loveth strife: and he that exalteth his gate seeketh destruction." That sin is what ==='s up strife (not watching tv...........plenty of nice decent shows on tv that are just fine to watch............especially christian shows that would not only be ok to watch but pleasing to god).
  Love scares me......anyone else afraid of love? I just don't know what to do with the stuff?
After church this sunday the pastors of the apostolic christian church say hi to me - I was chatting with them, all the sudden I felt so loved - terror hit me - flee my brain said - run for yer life! Abondon ship! Abondon ship! What the hell does a person do with love?????? I look over at the family next to me, also felt the love...........well that was it......I had to call it a day!
I know how to be angry at people and I'm especially skilled at..............like any..............is. Yep surely I am sailing into uncharted territory at my aunts apostolic christian church of america.
Part the reason I stayed with the smith's friends (this is "f'd" up but I'm telling you all the truth here) they didn't like me much (I a bit work hard to be a unpleasant $#%$#^$ so nobody cracks in........a lot of it just comes naturally though : ).........and I thrive some off of hate (I even enjoy being the bad guy, oh ya I like that : ). I know what to do with hate. I don't know what to do with love! Love is terrifying to me!
Yet I'm glutton for more, oh ya, you all know I ain't watched tv for 3 weeks now (well besides 1-2 hours of news)! Cause I figured out, if I don't watch tv, I get to go to my aunts church (I can't always I ain't been always able to get in my car and step on the gas pedal and go to my aunts church ------- I'm sayin kooky land stuffs here ---------- even though I wanted to go to the apostolic christian church of america ---------- extra kooky land buisiness I'm sayin here) So I don't watch tv, it's simple! : )
I don't care that this is a odd blog post. Unlike ozzy I think my mental wounds did heal - YIKES! YIKES! YIKES! uh oh. hahahahahahahahahahahaahahahahahaahah
I told you all this before smith's friends Proverbs 27:5 "Open rebuke is better than secret love." You'd be better off openly rebuking me then this secret love you hold for me!