I'm tired, I don't want to go to church anymore, it's not fun for me - I've only been going to church to try and please god but it's torture. But that it's pure torture 1 billion % it is SUFFERING THE FLESH GOING TO CHURCH IS 2 Corinthians 1:5 "For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ." Church is so much torture, there's people loosing limbs having a better time then me on earth on sundays.........................if they get morphine - brian says though hospitals don't just dole out morphine like candy anymore like they once did............................

At this point in time all the skin is back on my arm, where the bandaid is, and now I'm still wearing bandaids but that's to lock in the scar gel (had a cancerous melanoma removed - it was the least severe type of melanoma)..................

I'm tired, I don't want to go to church anymore, it's not fun for me - I've only been going to church to try and please god but it's torture. But that it's pure torture 1 billion % it is SUFFERING THE FLESH GOING TO CHURCH IS 2 Corinthians 1:5 "For as the sufferings of Christ abound in us, so our consolation also aboundeth by Christ." Church is so much torture, there's people loosing limbs having a better time then me on earth on sundays.........................if they get morphine - brian says though hospitals don't just dole out morphine like candy anymore like they once did............................

city...............................has burned me out

and I'm trapped here

we are about to build our cabin, but it's only going to be a place we visit 😞

I'm tired of being tired, I'm tired of being in the city where people are in such a rush

I want to buy a more delux tiny home, I really do, I actually do.............something that would "lure" brian to live not in the city anymore. 

to a small town, where people have free time they might even want to be friends with you AND I MEAN ACTUALLY FRIENDS BECAUSE THEY LITERALLY HAVE ENOUGH FREE TIME TO HAVE FRIENDS

I want to listen to country music and pet prairie dogs all day long I WANT TO DO THAT!

THAT'S HOW OVER THE CITY I AM 

I'm over it

the cemeteries some them are good - but that good??????????

(they've have to have rave parties day and night in the cemeteries of the city for me to want to even think about wanting to live any longer in the city i'm over the city) 

I'm over the city so bad

I'd rather have diabeties!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

we sold all the time the fast life, the fast life, the fast life

but damn

in the cities everyone is to danged buisy most of them to make or have friends or if they do "not much since they are so buisy"

we have been lied to 

"life more abundantly" 

isn't in mansions, or fast boats or fast cars

it's in the small towns!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

if your to tired or buisy in the city living your high falutin city lives to have or make friends much THAT AIN'T YOU HAVING "LIFE MORE ABUNDANTLY" THAT SUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKS

NAW

NAW

GIVE ME PRAIRIE DOGS TO PET ALL DAY LONG AND COUNTRY MUSIC TO LISTEN TO IN THE BOONIES

done with the city

done with it

but trapped here

......................................land we building a cabin on, has it's own private driveway even, it's so nice, it reminds me of my grandpa's house (on mom's side the family) has a fancy rock area off the main street our property does where I'm planning on planting cute plants - maybe few cute lawn ornaments 😁

maybe me and brian bought to nice of a piece of land cause it's the epitomy of relaxation and the "slow life" and that seems like the nicest shiz on earth to me right now. 

---------------  I don't want to get more jobs, and kiss more butts, and make more money so that I can finally have friends I'm already tired out

over the city I'm over it I want to let the fast kids and/or people living excess of riot to have the city................

1 Peter 4:4

Wherein they think it strange that ye run not with them to the same excess of riot, speaking evil of you:

but brian and the kids love the city they love it - I'm out numbered and trapped in the city

update ------------ 

turns out brian thinks like me and we are building a small cabin on our property and then getting permit for septic system and getting a septic system installed on that property --------- and then putting a entire home on that property 😁👍