For a identity in christ jesus THAT THE GATES OF HELL CAN'T EVEN RIP AWAY!!!!!!!!!!! For those who are new to my blog, not long ago my sister got a dna test, said she was not jewish at all, then my whole family decided they are completely white. (even though my sister is a half sister, and my dad and her never got a real dna test done to see if they were really related they just assumed - the ancestry test she took is only accurate fully via a son the type she did take) My brother told me that all my "christian jew" talk was crazy, that I ain't a christian jew he says.........that I'm completely white, and am more crazy then his ex wife Randy he told me for thinkin myself to be a christian jew.
My whole life I was told, my great grandpa was a full jew, who gave his life to jesus, changed our last name from Rubenstein to Ruby -- to me all that at least opens up the possibility for me to be a christian jew.
Though my family has gotten me sitting around thinking.........well am I really supposed to just be white right now??????????
They all believe they are 100% white I guess? My half sister recently put up a old family photo of us on her facebook..............................MAYBE IT'S ALL PROOF IN THEIR MINDS THAT WE ARE 100% WHITE PEOPLE??????????.........................
Ya my half sister has three african american kids, in the photo above. And my cousin melinda is married to a latin man (front center of above photo) and they live in spain and have kids.
Also in the above photo, it was very very sunny out as you can see, I know my family loves this photo right now, my sister probably just posted that up recently on her facebook for a reason. This is one of the "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh look at the ruby family so white it's so nice" ----- photo's. I'm chill with white people (I'm part white I know that, I'm just saying I'm not trying to be some white hater right now or nothing) my family is gone to extreme's with this white people are better then everyone stuffs. I like being a christian jew!
I have a identity as a christian, they can't take that away from me! People out there have I believe have lessened me in christ ------ the public at large has it appears decided I am a regular person just like them and popular and everyone likes me, that is the official "script" these days. But I also potentially forfeited my vocation a great deal - I needed help, if you don't feel like any humans either can help you or are qualified to help you, you sometimes ask for the help that can! (so I tried to pray real hubby with me, and he was right there turns out, waiting for me to pray.......................everyone thinks that's just crazy stuffs and I realize that plenty ------- I'm just a white girl that everyone likes real pretty "the script" if you aren't clued in that I hate the script "clues dropped").
Worse, worse I've tried to be that, I wanted to be that, I WANTED TO BE MARILYN MONROE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Who wouldn't, who wouldn't want all the guys paying attention to you and money, money, money, and not having to work all the time and getting to sit by pools etc. etc.
But that ain't me. And it's better, there is a better identity for me in christ jesus. (((((((doesn't involve pools, every summer our family just has a above ground pool, that is like 3-4 feet tall, it's alright.............not the lifestyles of the rich and famous at all though))))))))))))
Why I hate the label "pretty popular white girl" ---------------- I loath any label, that would reduce me down like that. We are more then our labels. We are souls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Souls with eternities!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
But how much so many of us out there love to stick the labels on each other! "Oh he's a ------------------------" "Oh she's a ------------------------------" That's what people like everyone in their nice little files in the index card box of life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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