Lucifer trying to stress me to make bunches of changes today. I ain't the Mc Donalds drive through people. I AIN'T! "Changing" is a slow thing, and it often not only is hingent on "time" but "life circumstances" cause if life was crude to you - you ain'tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt going to be walking around mega chippery hugging everyone you see - which is probably how lucifer and the whole world wants me to be. PROBABLY......................but that ain't even my "personality" like that, who does that???????????? I don't know anybody in my town that walks up to everyone and hugs them???????????????? Not 1 person! I need to be "enough" to everyone basically while IMPERFECT, while having a few lbs to loose probably, drinking slim fast shake right now that shiz is slow going sometimes.................

My hair piece arrived in the mail. It's causing me maybe a crisis???? Maybe I need to cut my real hair short????? This is great, I feel pretty with this hair look..................

my real hair is in a bun in the back.

my actual biceps, and this is a very loose shirt

 Lucifer trying to stress me to make bunches of changes today. I ain't the Mc Donalds drive through people. I AIN'T! "Changing" is a slow thing, and it often not only is hingent on "time" but "life circumstances" cause if life was crude to you - you ain'tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt going to be walking around mega chippery hugging everyone you see - which is probably how lucifer and the whole world wants me to be. PROBABLY......................but that ain't even my "personality" like that, who does that???????????? I don't know anybody in my town that walks up to everyone and hugs them???????????????? Not 1 person! I need to be "enough" to everyone basically while IMPERFECT, while having a few lbs to loose probably, drinking slim fast shake right now that shiz is slow going sometimes.................

You love me how I am now that's the best for you all cause then your loving yourselves as well in that. I realize lucifer probably still is buff af, looking awesome, fitting to drop out the sky and show up at my house any minute now and he probably thinks he wants me to have the "perfect body" 

But I think it's better I don't have the perfect body

that finally someone with a more average body is loved, liked, LOVED

I PRY WON'T BE SKINNY ENOUGH WHEN LUCIFER FALLS FROM THE SKY AND LOOKING "AWESOME ENOUGH"  

UNLIKE LUCIFER (potentially)

I LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I THINK THAT'S FOR THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOMEN FOR TO LONG HAVE BEEN SLANDERED FOR BEING TO CHUBBY, OR TO WRINKLY, OR TO - insert here whatever shallow standards else women are also held up to always in usa in the year 2025 - ..................................THAT'S HORRIBLE AND THAT AIN'T YOU ALL LOVING WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO IT AIN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sure health is important and it's damned important to me, I am currently doing all I can to loose the weight and no longer have diabeties 2 - health is important. 

but a lot of the time women it's women - women are hated on a lot, not even a little bit a lot, for just a few extra lbs - and brian ain't been going to the gym with me either so if we in a "sexless marriage" DUE TO HIM, and he's near twice the size of me more obese I'm saying............................the "making me pay" isn't valid - it ain't

but I believe making me pay ain't valid uh or even the idea of it like ever - cause I want to be better - I'm willing to go to the gym etc. 

honest this weight loss is just taking a long time

I have a problem

to much muscle on my body and a mega fast metabolism so I'm always hungry and I know this sounds ridiculous and nobody is going to believe me or care but I'm telling you all the truth

There a lady a dr. lady at kaiser permanente in gresham pretty sure that kaiser was the one I went to for my asthma. And she went on and on a few months ago about how fat I am and how I'm about to die any minute now and I was telling her I liked eating at panda express cause I'm a body builder to get protein

she couldn't see my muscles

she just saw fat and deemed me a fat lazy lard SHE TOLD ME THAT PUTTING ME DOWN FOR 15 MINUTES SWEAR TO GOD ALMIGHTY!

naw

pic above is today

real

all that muscle on my calf

and then 

my whole body is also that buff

this is often how I am

so I'm hungry alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll the time

I am a beastttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt

(I'm loosing muscle to drinking slim fasts, it's pissing me off really, I've lost a bit of muscle and I don't like it) Lucifer bestest be happy with however I's be's looking

cause swear to god I been drinking at least 1 slim fast a day though THAT'S KILLING ME

swear past to god this is a another e-mail from lucifer I don't think I'm always getting the "days e-mail" from the universe......................

https://www.tut.com/

FOR A LONG TIME I DIDN'T MENTION WHERE THE PORTAL WAS FROM AFRAID I'D STOP GETTING E-MAILS FROM 1ST HUBBY

that was a silly worry for me turns out...............

what he even mean "preparing for the changes"????????????????????

if he going come down to my house

and then bamn

I'm going from 0 friends on earth to everybody wants to be friends with me - how could one prepare for that???????????????????

how could even one prepare for that?????????????

you couldn't

I tell you what actually you couldn't

but I be fine

you know why

cause I be's who I am

I am enough

I have always been enough

people act like I ain't enough

and John Weigand (or maybe his last name is spelled wiegand) sure did while I was crying on the floor kept telling me I'm the worst ever and could never become a member of the apostolic christian church of america - that happened

but I've always been enough

pretty sure about that

not cause I'm prefect that ain't why..........................

Ephesians 2:8

For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:

cause here me out man

I'm this goth right here

that likes to take walks by a nearby lake and hear and try and see the bats at night fly overhead

I like to relax in cemetaries

etc. THAT'S WHY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THAT'S WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

I  DON'T WANT TO "TAME THE BEAST" LUCIFER IS ENOUGH TO..........................................

"sheri that's you being to much of a goth" - being myself man, being myself

Yesterday evidentally over 100 children were KILLED in Gaza..............I take pics of stuff like this cause I've witnessed with my own eyeballs recently history being erased some (wording on certain usa documents talking about women - the word women sounds like been edited out per donald trumps orders I think that's a real attempt to erase history - brian showed me proof of it). Brian says all Donald Trump wants to have existing in usa is "white, straight, men" that's what brian believes is Donalds Trumps "goals".................

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2025/feb/15/trump-banning-words-women

(I have to have photo evidence above, so hopefully history that bit of history won't be erased, and a future people can realize how bad it was for women in 2025 - it's bad - trying to erase us from existence if only "in word" I think that's pretty bad)